Um... wow! I still can't believe I'm going on a date with him...

Her outfit: http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=41832992

This was the worst possible thing ever. Driven by my need to be nice, I asked her out but I digress. The real worst possible thing ever was currently clinging to my back, screeching his head off. That's right, Vivi, my faithful animal companion, that never shut up. "Fine, fine, fine, you can come." I reached behind me trying to remove him but he refused to let go. Too smart for your own good. Fine. We'll play it that way. With a clack of wood on wood, the door shut behind me. A few minutes later, I had arrived. Of course, I had no time to admire her in any way, due to the screeching beast clinging to my back, wanting me to slow down. Finally, when I stopped, Vivi climbed his way up to my shoulder, apparently gawking at the woman in my presence.

"Yeah. I found him on my travels. I'm not really one for animals, but the little guys grown on me." Vivi screeched slightly, opening his mouth in a great big smile. "He thinks you're cute haha."

"Dead. Well...sorta. I kinda wasn't completely out...but it was bad. I traveled from California to here. Picked this little guy up at Oklahoma." I said, scratching his chin. He is the perfect wingwan after all.

"Ask his permission first or he'll bite.. Palm out and up in front of him." I said, staring at her legs as she approached. She may be horrible, but damn she's fine. "He could also bite if you put your hand too close too."

Vivi stroked her palm with the tips of his fingers. "Alright, he's allowed it." My eyes wandered to her chest a moment. Then, noticing the sudden shif in my view, I raised my head, a little too fast.

"Well of course we are. We're men." I said, this time allowing my gaze to drop to her chest once more. "It's the conditioner he uses. He loves to bathe so I spent a little extra to get him the best of the best." I said, staring.

"Work how?" I asked cocking my head to the side for a better view. "He usually won't leave the cabin," I said, almost turning my head completely upside down. "The conditioner was made by someone named Channel or something like that. I just remember that it reminded me of a T.V. and some odd brand of chocolate cerial."

"Yeah, there ya go. That's the name. And she doesn't, It was a special request. " I rolled my eyes at he comment, "I'm not touching, just getting the full effect."

"Well, I'm not rich or anything, she just never had seen a monkey before, said she would make shampoo and conditioner for him if I wanted. Everything after the first bottle however, had a price." My eyes trailed to her legs. "You're oddly regular."

"Well, your breasts aren't really that big, your legs don't accentuate your beauty at all, and your face is barely a B." I avoided the money question. If you've a mokey, you tend to gather money rather quickly. He's good at filling the cup after all. "Just sayin."

"You asked." I said, Vivi, pulling on my hair. I swatted his hands away and looked at her. "You expected too much from me. I'm just another man." I said, focussing on her chest again. "Eh, I could give em an A."

"You tell me." I said, digging through Vivi's fur looking for ticks or bugs. I caught a few fleas and lowered him to the ground. He screeched slightly, and I nodded a response. Seconds later he disappeared into the brush.